Goodmorning Sunshine!

Good of the Old

2009-05-16T18:23:00.000-07:00

...And now end of the old. Last post on this blog.

SSSisms - Previous Comm Design Assn.

2009-04-18T20:15:00.001-07:00

Performance Art was my Movement. And oh, what a Movement it was.

Metaphor: Friendship can be handy in times of darkness.

Symbol: When two people are back to back like that, it normally symbolizes that the two trusts each other (for the meantime) to watch each other's back and trust them with their lives.

Sign: Friends Crossing. Signs like that are normally put up to protect whatever is crossing, like children or deer. In this case, this sign exists to protect friendship.

One thing to add to the overall piece is that, with the background by itself, it means nothing. Much like how performance art is without the performer. But in this case, with myself and the flat figures in the piece, we create something together thru our friendship.

So far..

2009-04-16T17:58:00.001-07:00

So I haven't updated this place much recently. But its because I don't really know what to update now. I have officially changed my major. Im excited, nervous, and determined. I keep thinking and slowly sculpting my future goals. I wish Ringling wasn't so strict about their majors, but I completely understand why. When you focus and strictly keep to the curriculum, you are sure to get the expected quality you want in the students. But then there is me who wants to criss-cross into both aspects. My future is not as direct anymore as it would have been if I just stayed in Computer Animation, but I feel this is closer to what I wanted in my life. I love art. Art is what I was meant for, i think, in life. It's a gift and curse. As much as I love the concept of the sciences, I just don't have the knack for it. I also don't have a knack for painting, but as little patience as I already have, im more tolerant for art frustrating me.

I feel as though im feeling my way. The embodiment of what im meant to do in life is somewhere in a haze, and im feeling my way thru the fog. Hands tracing along the surface of different obstacles and light sources, which represent each aspect in my life that slowly bring me closer to the ultimate light, my place in the world.

I have been told I have a natural ability to find fluidity and movement, and thats with me not really trying. Sadly, i find pushing movement in 'illustrations' more satisfying. It's like me being told I had the natural ability to sing, but to everyone's dismay, I greatly disliked singing in front of people. Waste of talent, i suppose? But I love to act! haha. I can perform in front of huge crowds, just not sing. I guess I unconciously go for the harder route.

My goal as of now is to learn all that I can learn being an illustrator, and teach myself all the 3D aspects, like: modeling, texturing, and animating. Those I can learn from my friends or from other sources. I won't be as great as the students who are strictly in that focus, but i will have the drawing, color sense, varied media, and commercial abilities that won't be taught in CA. I want the skills that illustrators are taught to better myself as an artist. Not an illustrator. Not a computer animator. Not as a ringling student. But as a person whose life discipline is the arts. Bringing myself to self-enlightenment, so to say. Sounds corny, but I just now see myself as an artist/entertainer foremost, and then I apply myself as an illustrator/3d artist. It would be the same as me being an artist at heart, but working in engineering. I would apply my artistic way of thinking into the technical side.

The point is, I am going to dedicate myself to learning all that I can learn and practice here as an Illustrator, but I definately aim to still work in the film/game industry.

The future seems to be headed into a computer animation craze, and with so much of that going around, I'm sure I can catch enough information and instruction to teach myself. The art of illustration is not AS popular, but i feel the different aspects in illustration is still quite neccessary. (color, concept, composition, storytelling) It's just that it's not taught in great detail when you go into a strict focus like comp anim. (imo) I really want this foundation in my skillset, before I dabble with the digital counterparts of all that.

Why am i such a supporter for Illustration, after being a strong computer animation advocate?

To be honest, before I ultimately decided on computer animation for my major or future goal. I gave passive-agressive consideration for illustration. The painting classes scared me off. I never painting. Tried it a few times before (incorrectly), and was turned off to painting from that point on. But now that I've seen what painting can do, and i've tried it myself, im still not great, but i'm strangely determined to learn. It's like a video game i keep dying in, and getting frustrated with, but i keep wanting to come back and play it again in determination.

I feel so determined and ambitious. I want to learn more about myself and what i'll accomplish. I don't know whats possible, but by God I will do what no other illustrator here i know has done. Be a Illustration major, maybe Viz Dev minor, and Game Art concentration (know modeling, texturing, and enough animation) student. I dont care for Character Animating anymore. lol. I now know thru practice the raw meaning of it, the art of movement (duh), and i don't really want to spend hours on how to make the character run correctly. I want to tell a story, whether its thru environment or scenarios, and spend hours on that. The act of movement is secondary to me after storytelling. And as much as storytelling is the main thing in CA, the art of movement is just as big. Something I underestimated and just plain didn't know until i tried it. As I learned before, programming computers looks FUN (it does!), but it wasn't until i tried some of it out for myself did I find it was not for me. Astronomy looks fun, but astrophysics im sure will be like oil and water with me.

I can't wait for next year to learn and do something that I feel supports & encourages my "lifestyle".

I feel pretty stubborn. lol

Anyways, this post was to get out all that I've learned about myself and things in geneal. Something to look back to and see my progress as a person. I like information, so alot of this was just whenever i had idle thoughts, felt inspired to research studios and artists, or was talking & explaining with my fellow friends and classmates what my inclination for changing majors was.

Keep at it, self! Your past self looks forward to being the best and happy!

Humm.

2009-03-22T11:03:00.000-07:00

Talked to my dad, and I feel a whole lot better.

Just need one more factor to make my decision. And then it's off to my Class Advisor.

today

2009-03-20T19:28:00.000-07:00

I turned in a project that was due today. We had like 5 weeks to work on it i suppose. I am just guessing. And I started working on it like around 9pm. (im guessing again) I took an hour nap. Then worked on it all morning. Finished just as class started. But had to make two trips to my dorm since my pieces were life size.

I did a performance art thing for my communicating design assignment. The teacher loved it. I did costume change aswell.

He implied that he would have loved to enter my piece into the Best of Ringling Core classes, but my artwork was too big, and I would have had to stay with my artwork since I was practically a part of it.

So thats a nice boost to my ego of sorts. I'm sleepy. And tired.

Still researching my options. Researching, researching. Thinking thinking.

Drawings

2009-03-17T11:59:00.001-07:00

Gnomon DVD inspired. It was an exercise an artist said he did to generate concepts. So I tried to find scribbles and lines that I felt flowed out of me. I didn't copy his style, so these scribbles is just me letting the pencil flow.

Was beauty struck by the view out of the window. As you can prolly tell.

Close up.

Value study for Color Ob.

Monochromatic Self Portrait in Acrylic.

Split Color Still Life in markers with touch of pastel.

People drawing assignment...

....creatively redraw assn.

And again...

Annnnd again...

...unfortunately scanner didn't scan the other properly.

Hilarity

2009-03-17T09:43:00.000-07:00

"Sometimes I am actually smarter than I think I am... Or just lucky."
- Me

just curious

2009-03-09T22:02:00.001-07:00

talked to advisor. Just talk. Scoped my options. Varied from Game Art, Digital Film, GIC, and Illustration. Although, im pretty sure I would not choose GIC or Digital Film. So between Game CA or Illustration. Not sure what I'd do tho. So my advisor gave me a list of people to talk to. Mostly dept. heads. I'm not sure if Im meant to be in Computer Animation. I can do it, but will i truly enjoy it. The idea of working in studios with fellow animators and enjoying the different community things seems so wonderful.

I'm not sure if Illustration will pay enough. Why am I worried with pay? I need money. I hear its the thing to have these days. It's one thing to pursue your career, and then to pursue it while being poor. Im pretty sure I can be happy and make anything work. But what will my parents think? I already know it's my choice. So I shouldn't worry. But im so considerate. Sometimes I wonder if my kindness get in the way of getting things done. Im sure it will pay enough if you enjoy it enough and make something of it.

I don't like 2D animating. And it's a risk to keep going at this rate, not knowing for sure what I really want. Cuz its time and money that is weighed into this equation. Right now I supporting my efforts thru the idea that I'll love 3D animating. But the idea of secluding myself in the labs is almost... I don't know. I don't know what I want. Thats why this Spring Break I want to find myself. I've got until April 9 to make my choice.

Thankfully, Ringling is the best school for the majors I'm interested in. Not so much GAD just yet, but thats only cuz they haven't had the chance to shine. I don't want to give up. After all, this is what I've been working so hard for. Life is so difficult, yet I appreciate it so much.

It'd be awesome if................i could major in Illustration and minor in motion graphics. Oh ya, I should check to see summer classes about that.

Glendale CC has motion graphics. But nothing good during the summer.What a bummer. I guess just do more research online. I will do that later today (tomorrow since i haven't slept yet). Something for me to do. And atleast I'll get sleep. So that I can survive/stay awake during Vilppu's workshop. Yup.

2009-03-06T21:03:00.000-08:00

Screw that getting a normal job thing. Not everybody can have animation as their job. I think it is uberly unfair that I would be subject to having to face CA or go to a normal job. I mean.... I enjoy different things. I enjoy drawing,m and I enjoy making stories. I wonder what the game art and design major is like. But in all honesty im not sure what my path will take me. I feel just as confused as some other peo0pope but at times I feel like I know more. IAnd techinically if you loook at al my knowledge I really do know more. But with ringling's GAD i don't know eough. Not enough to really have enough to base my information on. And right now my friends are watching a movie that I don't feel like watching. I want to watch it=, but I don't want to right now. OFcourse, just hearing mina screawm is enough to illustrate to me what could possibly be happening. Eff that shit. If I don't want to animate traditionally then I shouldn't have to. I am really tired too. So sleep sounds good about now. But whatever. Yawwwwwnnn......

Almost Spring Break!

2009-03-05T05:07:00.000-08:00

I've been forgetting to put up my movie "reviews", so I guess I'll be doing that sometime soon. Maybe even later today. And I may also take pictures of my actual work. Things that aren't just sketches. ;\

I don't know if I am happy yet. Confused.

btw, I'm going to a Vilppu workshop this Spring Break! yeeeeey.....

2009-03-03T10:57:00.001-08:00

new start for me today.

oy!

2009-02-26T13:58:00.001-08:00

Well, I passed by the Career Office today, just being nosy ya know. And the Advising Office was just next door. They had the sheets that show the basic curriculum of all the majors....

I saw the curriculum of Illustrators, and I didn't like it. lol! I am NOT interested in painting at all. So thats that. I'll just take Illustration electives (maybe minor if i can in it), but I'm sticking with animation. I am still not excited about traditional animation, so I hope I can survive with this reluctant outlook on it.

:)

...or am i really sure? Doh!

A post with less depression

2009-02-25T20:23:00.000-08:00

I feel a bit better than before. I guess I can seem like a depressing, or easily de-motivated, person, but I'm pretty sure thats not the whole truth. haha. I still haven't found my love for Traditional Animation class. I'm not sure if it's the whole animating process that bums me out, because you can animate one scene, scan it into the computer, but then the whole scene can be animated completely wrong. I guess I'm used to doing things near "perfectly" the first time around. Especially since animating just one scene can take nearly a whole day.

I can't wait for Computer Animation, but Traditional Animation is truly testing my loyalties. I don't want to go into Game Art and Design because I don't care about Game Mechanics. I don't want to write a 10 page paper on a particular game mechanic that has been prevalent in games throughout the years. I don't want to break Space Invaders down into parts so that I can understand how the game works and why it was made in a certain way.

But, I also don't really want to go into Illustration because...I don't think it pays much? It's a harder industry to survive in? I'm not great in conceptualizing characters. Then again, I haven't really been trying all that seriously.

I could always try animating in Maya on my own to see if I'm good at it, I can try conceptualizing characters, I can try making actual illustrations.

...I don't know where I stand right now. (i know, i'll never know unless I try, and I will.)

Computer Animation I feel (or brainwashed myself to think) is more respected. Higher demand in. Broader job choices. Well-rounded skills to do anything with. ...Easier to do, maybe?!

I guess it comes down to whether I want to put the time into animating, ya know? Then, just thinking of doing Traditional Animation ALONG with Computer Animation doesn't sound like cake. Not that I ever expected it to be. But now having a taste of what Traditional Animation is like, I almost could say, "I'd rather do without." I keep tabs on the Freshmen Illustrators here, and I'm always intrigued with their projects. Ofcourse, it can easily be a case of "The Prince and the Pauper". One wants to be the other cuz they are tired of what they have.

Rhetorically: I want to be an illustration major because I think their assignments looks easy and fun. But I hear Illustrators who want to be Computer Animation majors cuz they think it looks fun.

Whaaaaaaaat-Ever. I'll just keep truckin'. If things don't shape up by next year.... I don't know.

...BTW, going to DisneyWorld this Saturday. Fun! Never been, so I look forward to the adventure.

Progress

2009-02-25T16:27:00.000-08:00

Another week passes, and I try to keep my head up. I almost feel as if everything I do is wrong.

Please keep your head up, self. Don't lose yourself and drown.

Sketchies

2009-02-25T10:37:00.000-08:00

Rough Storyboard for Flour Sack #2

(got depressed for a few minutes, which lead me to draw this:)

These next two are value studies for Observ. Color class:

The comic I colored debuted!

2009-02-13T12:23:00.001-08:00

http://www.seibertron.com/transformers/news/transformers-mosaic-dellusions/15105/

Go to that link! yey!

The only sad part is that they forgot to credit me. I'm kinda bummed about it, but I figure I'd rather be known for a piece of work that was really awesome. I'm proud of my coloring on there, but it could have been better. Never done smoke either, so that was a first for me. It'll be printed in a Transformer IDW comic SOMEDAY, so thats cool.

Aside that, I'm discouraged with life in general. I am only good at art, i think, i may have some management/schedule abilities, but.... I'm really nothing. I don't think im a true artist. I don't think i'm anything useful to society. Maybe a temporary scab for people who need assistance. I am going to contradict myself here, but I think I can be something really awesome in life, but I also see myself being such a big failure.

Just going thru the times. Trying to survive. Trying to live.

Like I've told myself before, I can easily see the world passing me by. I'll be left behind. And I'll be bittersweet about it. My maturity level can vary, depending on the situation. But often times, I know I act childish most of the time. Whether it's because I don't believe I've grown up yet, I want people to think that I am no threat (under estimate me) so that I am percieved as a neutral force, I lied so much about myself that I can't help but continue acting that way, or because I really am ignorant of the world and don't know how to handle being on my own (except for the basic survival skills, like: microwaving food and trying not to die in anyway possible).

What will the future hold. Can I survive college?

....Can I finish my hw?

Sketch Poot

2009-02-10T13:35:00.000-08:00

First off, I'll show you something that was productive to my schoolwork assignments:

Next, I'll show you what I did to NOT be productive in my class assignments or HW:

K, point made. I am SOOOOO hating HW right now. Especially since Observational Color is taking up most of my time!! I am so not awesome in that class right now. I'm pretty that I am the most behind student out of all of them. But, I tend to fall in the underdog position constantly. I guess I unknowingly like to show people what i'm made of at the last minute. Who knows.

....Well im going now. To do more hw (maybe).

:)

Woodruff and stuff

2009-02-03T02:45:00.000-08:00

Well I didn't finish my color assn., but it was fine, the teacher was cool with it. I had such a messy day at class tho. Paint everywhere! And the teacher was kinda disgusted/amused at the colors i was getting while mixing. lol! I need to work on my patience and craftsmanship when it comes to paint.

Speaking of which tho. Thomas Woodruff's Freaks Parade is awesome! The colors are so... amazing! They pop out from the dark paper that is drawn/painted on.

So yea, back to classes. Trad. Animation was alright. We're working on flour sacks now. FUN. Sorta. I'm having some trouble, but I think i just need some getting used to animating something that is not a ball. hehe.

Beautiful rainy day!

2009-02-02T05:42:00.001-08:00

It's 8:42 and i'm trying to finish my trad. animation hw AND my observational color hw! I'm not worried. I spent the weekend doing some hw and drawing figures (for fun!). It got to the point where I said, "Screw hw, cuz it's time for some personal drawing time."

Course, here I am now.... doing hw.

2009-01-29T13:38:00.000-08:00

So, I just turned in my 3 animations of bouncing balls for critique. And the teacher didn't pick at it as much as she did other people, so I feel accomplished! I personally don't think they were bad either, but there are moments in my animation that I wish weren't there. I ran out of time to go back and fix those seemingly minute errors, but it was presentable.

We are now gonna be animating Flour sacks! Wow, don't I feel like such an animator now! hehe. I meant that sincerely too. I was working on my animation from like....8ish to 11pm. Then I woke up at 8am to animate from 9am to 12:30pm. Animating actually doesn't take all that much time, but fixing up any mistakes can last twice as long.

I almost felt insulted when the teacher asked if I wanted to be a "character animator" because of how I animated one of my balls. That should be a compliment, i'm sure, but see thing is I wasn't TRYING to give the ball character. Eh...whatever tho. I'm sure that was a compliment, so I'll take it as so.

to be cont.

old work dump

2008-12-15T20:59:00.000-08:00

So fugging tired!!!

2008-12-11T19:11:00.000-08:00

I basically went thru alot in the last 2 months. I will elaborate later, because I just went thru a shit load of finals, and I am so tired.

TIIIIIRED.

btw...Boat Project FTW!

I love Ringling!

WINTER VACATION HERE I COME! Now if only I can survive the flight back to California.

More Costume Pics

2008-09-27T20:53:00.000-07:00

3D Design project

2008-09-07T22:34:00.000-07:00

The most recent assn. was about making 4 sketches, pertaining to a certain word that we got to choose from a short list, and then making it out of a 8ft wire that was given to us by our teacher.

I choose the word "Directional", and came up with this:

Other than that, I also had to draw 60 human figure gestures:

Which I will soon have to pick three figures, and make them out of wires too. I already have my eye on a certain one. ;)

Yey, I have a perspective hw & Business hw still to do.

Got my classes!! Woot!

2008-08-06T21:52:00.000-07:00

Development of Western Art & Ideas
Instructor(s): Ania Nazarian

Org. & Mgt. of Art & Des Bus (I believe the full name of this class is: Organization & Management of Art & Destruction. lawl.)
Instructor(s): Wanda Chaves

3D Design for CA,FA,PDI,GA,DI
Instructor(s): Mr. Peter Rampson

Perspective Drawing
Instructor(s): Mr. Steve Kaplan

Whoohoo! Leaving in 9 days! I can't believe it's coming this close!

lol, yes, I'm going to swim thru the air all the way over there. :D

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Now playing: Soundtrack - Another Believer
via FoxyTunes

Preparation for Ringling!

2008-08-03T21:56:00.000-07:00

Starting to pack my junk now! I'll be leaving in a week and a half! I'm kinda too nervous to even pack. I just wanna be accepted to the college, and given the chance to start school whenever semester I feel like. lol. Give me some time to mentally prepare! But instead, I'll be going in head first with fresh feet. Being 1 among the other freshmen students who will experience (real) college for the first time.

I'm really excited, but I have my reserved thoughts. Will I enjoy it there? What will living in a new area be like? What new things will I see? Will I get sick on the cafeteria food? lol.

Anyways, there are a few things I know will be kinda "hard". Not having my PC to play games on. Not having my own TV to play games on!! Not having all my Transformers toys with me. Not have Sable with me. Not having my queen size bed to sleep on. And other things I'm sure I can easily think of. But the point is not to think of things that I won't have, rather to see that I now have a college I can be proud to be in.

I will definately draw much more! And not worry about taking General ED. And personally take the time to explore. (oh shoot! I just remembered I still have to find a Work Study job. lol!) But yea.... eeeeeek! Packing my things gives me butterflies.

I am going to take LOTS of pictures. And ironically, I still haven't uploaded my pictures from the cons I went too. *embarrassed* I will eventually! I'm serious!! lol.

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Now playing: Dj Satomi - Lost in Space (Extended Mix)
via FoxyTunes

Im going to Ringling afterall!!!

2008-07-25T11:31:00.000-07:00

Just what the title says! I'm so excited!! I've finished all my loans, so it's a done deal! I'll be leaving in August a few days after my birthday. :D Whoohoo!

Revision

2008-06-12T21:31:00.001-07:00

I got a bunch of my other drawings from Life Drawing back. So I will upload those when I finally take a picture of them.

School is finally over. And taking 7 classes from 3 colleges was hectic. I will never try that again. lol. Barely made it this time. But I'm proud of myself for not dropping any of them. (As much as I wanted to) lol.

So I want to take a break this time and not go to summer school. Though I'm going to a career counselor tomorrow, and see what she says. Although it's kinda too late now since Summer semester starts next week, and I'm still burnt out from my 7 classes.

And I've decided to take a break from taking all those art classes, and just take General Ed stuff. I feel that way most likely because I'm kinda sick of doing art all the time. My 7 classes were all art related. And too much of something can turn ya green. That, and I think because of my problem with going to Ringling has kinda discouraged me to a point.

I haven't given up drawing, just laying off it a bit. And since I wasn't able to make a costume this year due to my underestimation of time and money, I will focus this year on school academics and costume development. Making costumes for AX is a big part of my life. A tradiation at this point. And I'm very disappointed for not being able to make the costume I wanted for this year.

So at the very least, I'm going to repair my Red Mage AF costume and construct a Sari Sumdac (transformers animated) costume. Sari has a very simple costume, so I really want to have that when I go for AX and Comic Con. My Red Mage is always a great costume to me.

I may have bitten off more than I can chew this time, but it truly was an experience though. And like I said before about the .hack//G.U. costume I made last year, "What doesn't kill us, only makes us stronger. And in this case, I believe we just leveled up atleast 2 skill points."

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Now playing: Tsuki No Le
via FoxyTunes

yarrr

2008-06-08T01:58:00.000-07:00

Well, im particularly bummed. It seems after getting accepted to Ringling, I'd be happy and set. But alas, i am torn away from that goal. I guess, getting accepted or not, I was not meant for Ringling.

I haven't told them I'm not going yet. And I got a mail package from them. Its wonderful to feel like i finally belong to a college now. I just wanna hold on to that feeling as long as I can.

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Now playing: Yasushi Ishii - The World Without Logos
via FoxyTunes

Senior Citizen Indiana

2008-05-25T01:18:00.001-07:00

I hate how the advertisements on the billboards and stuff show his sexy body, NOT his
old body with grandpa pants. >: ( LIES ALL LIES!!

And I hate Shia even more just because of this movie.

I don't wanna see Indy all old, but my dad wants to go see it. hehe.

I guess I'll just pretend it Metal Gear Solid 4. Old Snake...............

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Now playing: Double Head vs Pikachu remix - Pokemon Dance Mix
via FoxyTunes

California weather

2008-05-23T22:40:00.000-07:00

A joke I made with a friend.

And yea... Weather here is going crazy! It HAILED in Little Tokyo.
I wasn't there to see it, but yea...wow. Then tornado near loma linda. And all this other wierd stuff.
It's kinda cool and kinda scary. As long as no tornado comes near here and stuff.

Wonder what tomorrow will be like.

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Now playing: danceforce feat hypeman - shake your wiggle

Comic Book Cover assn.

2008-05-23T15:50:00.000-07:00

still need to work on it more...

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Now playing: Franz Ferdinand - AAA - Do You Wanna
via FoxyTunes

2008-05-23T01:00:00.001-07:00

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Now playing: Lasses Shit - NRK P3 Urørt - Audio from "Amateur"
via FoxyTunes

Halloween makeup design ideas

2008-05-21T22:06:00.001-07:00

Medium: Pastels, color pencil, pencil

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Now playing: E NOMINE - DAS RAD DES SCHICKSALS
via FoxyTunes

Guy from comic

2008-05-09T22:40:00.000-07:00

zahhhh

2008-05-09T01:01:00.000-07:00

Ringling (expensive, need more funds)
Laguna (maaaaaaybe, but housing expenses)
San Jose
San Francisco
~~UCLA~~ (not enough animation? and fend for yourself attitude)
~~USC~~ (too EXPENSIVE)

CSU Fullerton?
CSU Long Beach?

Oh, what the future holds for me?

2008-05-06T23:40:00.000-07:00

Today's Life Drawing exercise!

So in my last entry, I said: ......well, I basically said I wouldn't be able to go to Ringling this year.

BUT, im happy to say that I WILL re-apply to Ringling AND other prospective colleges. Those schools will be - Laguna College of Art and Design, Calarts, UCLA, USC, San Francisco State University, and San Jose State University. I am trying to find a school in California that will definitely give me what I need to get into the animation industry AND provide good scholarships, since the lack of that is what caused me the problem I have now.

I look forward to this year, I'll do things I wasn't able to do and more. I especially look forward to doing commissions sometime this year. I will continue to research more about loans AND get some face-to-face help from school counselors. I plan to visit each school on my list and see what they have with my own eyes. That was one set back for Ringling; I didn't have the money to go visit, so I relied on phone calls and CA.org acquaintances for my questions. Which isn't a bad thing at all! But it would have helped my situation if I could've gone to the school and found out for myself.

I don't feel down anymore! I really like this decision, and I have no regrets. Whats one year to come between a productive extra year and an expensive Ringling tuition? I hope that made sense. It doesn't to me, but it SOUNDS right. lol! But yea, I get to enjoy taking a variety of classes again to round myself out, instead of going to Ringling and worrying about money. Plus, like I told myself, "If I was good enough to get into Ringling this time, I should really be able to do it again next time. I must have more faith in my skill. If I didn't have that faith, then I couldn't have possibly survived Ringling this year with that mindset!"

So that is my conclusion to this. 1 year to regroup and prepare myself for a lifetime career (and a 10-20 year debt, lol).

Have fun year 2012 @ Ringling! Work yer ass off, cuz once I get into the game, I plan to get the job yer aiming for!

Let's see what the future holds...

Cover Page sketches

2008-05-04T11:40:00.001-07:00

Ok, so I may have some bad news too... I.. won't be going to Ringling anymore... Money concerns and all. I plan to continue learning at community college for one more year, and prepare for the Ringling tuition better. Tis a sad but hopeful thing. I may or may not elaborate more on this. I'll still be going to Sarasota before and during the orientation, but I won't be part of the festivities. I will most likely check out the campus since i'm there, and hopefully the won't mind me being around campus at that time.

Have fun class of 2012, hopefully 'seeya soon' class of 2013! heh.

Appropriation Assn.

2008-05-01T22:22:00.000-07:00

Appropriated "I want you" poster of Uncle Sam, into this skull-headed embodiment of American's EXPENSIVE STUFF! In another words it's representing how there are soo many enticing things to buy like analog/digital cameras, ps3, games, digital screen frames, and more, BUT because of the little money [most/some] people have, to buy one of those things would mean we'd have to sacrafice something else. Like food or school supplies.

It's also how the govn't seemingly wants us to spend more and more for stuff like taxes and gassssssssssssssssssssss.

"I Want You (to BUY MORE!)"

Made outta bestbuy and circuit city ads. The Skull is actually covered by a plastic sheet to simulate a computer screen.

-----

BTW, I quote myself quoting somebody:

"You know how when you mention "Ringling" to somebody, they think of clowns and the such. We'll I thought this guy was gonna say that when he said, "Ringling sounds like a...." he paused and thought for a second, "...like a ding dong school."

Yep. How ignorant. *sigh* And this kid is from an "elite" school. I sorta expected more intelligence from him. But alas, the logical world still does not acknowledge the art world.

Theres a first for everything...

2008-04-25T01:39:00.000-07:00

First actual, actual painting i've ever done in my life.
(that was not watercolor)

Tis L from Death note.

BTW

2008-04-24T22:27:00.000-07:00

I had a portrait drawing done of me. : )

This cool drawing was done by my classmate in Animal Drawing class. (i know it may be hard to tell that im not an animal, but irony was that none of us really drew any animals today)

As a payment for the drawing, I had to draw him. lol! I didn't do such a good job - in my opinion- so I told him I'd draw him again another day. ^^

Sigh

2008-04-24T21:39:00.000-07:00

I've been sighing all week, so i thought i'd emphasize it by titling this entry as such. And it's all because of the financial business. First of all, im not a very...financially informed person. I've never had to actually worry about financial things at all before. And it is not that I'm rich or anything near that, its because I've never been a financial burden before. When I was in Elementary school, my parents didn't really have to worry about paying because a friend of my parents was financially sponsoring me to go to school there. It was a private school. Then once the tuition was getting way too high, I went to public school. And I've been in public school ever since.

As for myself, I don't go shopping like some people. I don't go out and buy clothes or "outfits". I buy shoes once a year. I don't eat much. And whatever it was I wanted, I either waited till it was on clearance or found it at the swapmeet. My only costly aspect is the costume hobby I have. But even then, I spend it with the lunch money i've saved or not used in order to do this. Ofcourse, sometimes i have to rely on my parents for some things that I didn't have enough money for. Like my Transformers Obsession. But I've gotten over it (for now), lol.

So I really try not to be a costly child. When it comes to something like this now, I feel so horrible for putting my parents in this type of situation and I have no way to help. I dont have a job and my parents don't want me to have a job. Everything else is most likely pretty much up to me still.

I guess this is where I feel even worse. *insert sigh here* I haven't acquired any scholarships. Except for the one offered by Ringling. And I also got a call today from Laguna College. They told me that they raised my scholarship from 3500 to 5500. I felt so bad for telling them I won't be going. And I felt so many levels worse because i declined 5000 dollars. I feel like crying and going to sleep. But I'm cooler than that.

It's all up to me.. And I really don't mind just getting loans and being in debt. But I still feel like i have a duty to do something. Try more scholarship, get a job, get art commissions, not being such a loser. I almost feel bitter towards the Government for their ineffective FAFSA thing. I almost feel bitter towards people who don't deserve help from the govn't, but they get it. I almost feel bitter towards the corruption in the govn't and rich people. But I always keep in mind that there are people worse off. Like the lower to middle class white people. I almost rarely see any scholarships that are available for caucasian people, unless they are like super smart or have "connections".

I don't expect people to really empathize with my situation, since I know many people, who you could say is worse off, that work their butt off everyday by going to school & working, then get no help or parental kindness from their parents, and have to pay their own bills already. If they read this, they'd say "too bad, so sad". They'd say many things that aren't nice. And it'd make me wish they had a easier and happier life. Life isn't easy, i know my share of it, but if there were more sincere kindness in this world... Then again, what dimension did I crawl out of, huh? There is no such evidence of a world where a majority of the world's people are not dog eat dog.

Yey for going out of topic. I just need to get loans and scholarship.. I just wanna learn already.

World of Warcraft XI? lol

2008-03-25T21:39:00.001-07:00

A little drawing made at Tegaki E.
It's a place reminicent of Oekaki Boards. lol.

Fun fun! I mixed my fav. face type from FFXI elves with the World of Warcraft Blood elves.

Finished Psychological SP

2008-03-24T22:39:00.000-07:00

Okay, if you look at it closely, I'm sure you'll come to the conclusion that EVERYTHING WAS SADLY DONE. lol! I Totally regret working on this sorta last minute. I drew the portrait way ahead of time, but I didn't actually finish till 5 minutes before class. If anything, I'm really ashamed at how the hands came out. So please....don't stare at their hideous hands. lol. Anyways....I basically spilled all that about the drawing/painting, just so I could give a reason to why the hands look so bad (and any other grotesque formations you notice). X3

And so goes a potentially good drawing down the procrasination toilet drain... *fwaps self* I know, no excuse... And I gotta keep reminding myself about that for Ringling. >.< It's senioritis all over again!!!

:D

2008-03-15T22:15:00.001-07:00

Art Drop!

2008-03-11T20:21:00.000-07:00

Concept in Drawing Assn.

(Psychological Self Portrait WIP)

Zoo Drawings, yay!
(in watercolor too!)

In-class exercises.

Workshop Drawing. :D

Concepts in Drawing assn.
(Things I like. The things I hate I tried cutting off on the right, lol)

Phew, lots of drawings that i've neglected to upload for so long!

Rabanaffren #2!

2008-03-11T14:57:00.000-07:00

RASANAFERABEN!!! I got ACCEPTED to Ringling!!! WOOO! I seriously didn't believe I got in the first time I called. So i called a second time! XD;; Just to make sure. Ringling... I'll be seeing you soon. lol!

I will totally put up my portfolio now.... (did i say i would do that before, and never did?) LOL! Well, I will!!! x3 And I can now proudly make the word: Ringling, a part of my tags. lol!

wahhhh, work!

2008-03-10T23:20:00.000-07:00

Ahhhhh!!! Placeholder for my work! lol! I've seriously got alot of drawings, but I haven't been taking pictures of them. :( I'll try to get pictures tomorrow. I need good lighting to take pictures, but I'm either working on a project at school or hiding in my dark room.

I hear Ringling is sending out letters now for the Animation/Game dept. But I'm really curious. I may end up calling tomorrow morning. lol.

Plus I've got a ripping head because of the hour we've lost thru daylight savings time and cuz I rushed to do an essay an hour before I left home. Which was 5 am. Which was actually 4 am if you didn't add the hour like we're suppose to. Rawr.

Sin City!

2008-03-07T21:55:00.001-08:00

Sin City is one badass movie...

It was most likely about time I watched it, since i'm into that kinda thing.
I almost wish I watched it sooner. lol! But today was a good day.

I kinda think they (the sin city creators) can't get any better than this movie. The sequels i'm
still skeptical about. Cuz I really like Bruce Willis and the other guys' characters. The women characters wouldn't have been as strong without the guy characters.

I enjoyed the movie. :)

*Credit: Picture found at IGN.

Couple sketches..

2008-03-02T12:18:00.000-08:00

Sketch for an ID.

And sketch heads for a character.

I have more, but none I'm particularly proud of. lol.

Starship Troopers

2008-03-01T19:36:00.000-08:00

Starship Troopers rocked my ass!! I thought it was like some lame army version of "Tron" cuz of the blue glowy-ness seen on the cover, but it was actually more like "Halo" and "Quake". But Starship Troopers came first, so.... Oh well, whatever. I enjoyed it thoroughly. I liked the characters, I like the baddies/the bugs race, I liked the plot and everything!! Even the sfx weren't bad for a late 90s movie. lol! (listen to me say that, lol!! late 90s. I'm such a old fart/futuristic wannabe.)

I look forward to seeing more of this. I heard they have more of this series..so yea! See, we need more of this kinda movie making. They even had a sex scene, but it wasn't emphasized and overly done. The movie wasn't exactly 'original', since it got it's plot from a book, but it was a fresh change for ME from all these current movies, which have more effects than actual story. The story was great! The effects were like on Star Trek level, and thats fine for me, hehe. GO NOW, WATCH THIS if you haven't already. BUT, only if don't mind a share of blood, gore, death, and bug guts. lol.

Rabanaffren!

2008-02-29T16:50:00.000-08:00

I called to check to see if Laguna got all my application materials, and they did.

AND, the lady who I was talking with also decided to mention that I was ACCEPTED to their school. Ooooooomuhgud! Pretty cool, no? lol! It isn't my first choice, but it's nice to know that I'm IN at their school (WITH scholarship). Just the whole "you now have scholarship too" part makes me -not- believe that I got into their school, lol! I've NEVER gotten a scholarship. ANYWHERE. ANYHOW. So yea, wow. Im honored! It's still hard to believe that I was told I was accepted at their school... Mainly just cuz of the scholarship. XP It's all a lie, the cake is a lie! To mock me! hehe.

Still waiting calmly (and secretly axiously) for Ringling's response. Lots of things are going thru my mind. Oh well. These thoughts will just have to be silent until I get more info.

I was also wondering. When you go to LCAD's website, they don't talk much about their graduates. I was looking up Blogspot websites of LCAD students & alumni. Come to find out, THEY DO EXIST (the student's blogspots that is)! Not as much as Ringling or Calarts, but they're there. I wonder why doesn't LCAD's website mention those alumni.

If you go to LCAD or know somebody who does, I would like a opinion on that. lol.

So yea... Waaaaaiting, let's play the waaaaaaaaaaiting gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaame.

Nom nom

2008-02-25T16:48:00.001-08:00

I'll put up my actual portfolio when I get some kinda news from a school. x3 What? Im not nervous, no way! har har.

Trying it out!

2008-02-22T23:47:00.000-08:00

Been a loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong while since I've touched watercolors. lol! Like... 6 years old when I used them. But I'm slowly starting to like it. I don't know how to properly use them, but I'm just going with my gut feeling. hehe. I was trying to get a quick feel of it. (I was also, at the moment, inspired by: Panic at the Disco). I plan on doing uber mix of colors next time. Maybe one day I'll promote myself to using those tube watercolors. lol!

Anyways, yarrrrr!

Great News!

2008-02-22T19:17:00.000-08:00

I finalized my schedule! And I was able to get classes that either made my schedule easier or replaced a class that I didn't really like for certain reasons.

So WOOHOO about that!

AND, Ringling finally got my last recommendation paper! THANK YOU! FINALLY! hehe.

Now just to wait for RCAD. And also send in my application for LCAD still. @.@ I have less than 1 week left now. Yarrrr.

Ok, so now a 180º turn...or a 360º

2008-02-19T21:37:00.000-08:00

I went to Pasadena ever since I started college. But then I decided to go to ELAC full time (omfg I just now realize that I do a full time load & extra classes at other colleges). After taking 2 weeks worth of classes tho, which is really just two days of classes at ELAC, I came to feel that I wasn't really getting my money's worth. We were learning very slow since its a 1nce a week class & we were going even SLOWER cuz the teacher had to teach two dif. classes at the same time. More importantly, after taking today's Life Drawing class at Glendale, it made me realize that I should be taking classes that will really improve my skills. Learning animation right now is not neccessary. I will be taking animation for the next 4 years at a college that is really an ANIMATION school. So why spend $120 dollars for 2 animation classes thats not even very well developed, when I can take classes that will truly improve my drawing skills.

So here's the deal: I've dropped 2 ELAC classes, and I still have 2 there (animal drawing & comic book dev.) But NOW I'm taking classes at Pasadena, full time again, which consist of Figure Sculpture & Sculpture. I'm still on the pursuit of finding more classes to fulfill my full time status, so these are what I've got on mind, either: Ceramics, Anatomy emphasized Life Drawing, Sketching for Design, or Art History.

Man..that makes me tired just thinking about it.

I won't put up what my schedule will look like just yet, since...I don't wanna put all my eggs...before they hatch....or something like that...or is it "count my eggs"? But yea.. hehe. I find it amusing how I went from a very easy schedule to OMGUEZFUKINCRZY schedule.

And some really great news! I've take the precaution and initiative to ask 2 more people to write a recommendation for me. Cuz STATISTICALLY, ATLEAST ONE OF THEM WILL ACTUALLY MAKE IT TO RINGLING! rawr! So yea, hopefully, if things go well, I'll finally have a recommendation letter in their database by Thursday. If things go horribly obscene, then the letter will NOT make it on Thursday..... [insert horrid face here]

In any case, here's my pickles "properly" photgraphed:

Good News!

2008-02-18T19:30:00.000-08:00

Well, I've got my laptop back again! So i'm back in business.

Called Ringling, finally got in touch with somebody, and my recommendation isn't there yet. BUT, the good news is that my college teacher sent them a email version too, so they've GOT to get that one.

And since I have my laptop now, I'll be able to burn my portfolio for Laguna college too.

I was also able to finish my final project for Rendering class. :D And my teacher liked it alot! So I'm happy. Here's a quick photo of it:

Lastly, tomorrow! Tomorrow starts a new semester officially! Going to my life drawing class tomorrow, so I really look forward to that.

And as a self note to myself, sorta: I feel as though I've made a mistake choosing ELAC as my full time college. The night classes don't really bug me, but the whole, '1 class per week' and 'poor teaching enviroment' kinda sets me off. Don't get me wrong, the teachers are very good and inspirational. But taking a class only once a week doesn't get me pumped, and the animation lab is a very sad sight. Only 3 pencil test machines, very very old, and one was broken (for a 20 avg. class). The teacher was given a 2 class at 1 time schedule. So while shes teaching us Background and Layout Art students, shes also teaching the Storyboarding class. Meaning neither class gets the teacher's full attention. Even she says it's hard for her to teach a class on two dif. subjects. And it's all that, not to mention the type of neighborhood its in, that discourages me a bit from complete excitement. BUT, I did make the choice of going there, albeit it was a sort of last minute choice, and it was the only college in the surrounding city area that had a near complete animation program.

So all I can do now is keep my head up and make the best of it.

And hopefully a good future will come!

2008-02-16T23:21:00.000-08:00

Im freakin' out! ARRRRRRGH. So much for applying. ;o; Reccomendation hasn't arrived yet. *sighs*

Chinese New Year!

2008-02-09T20:26:00.000-08:00

Went to the Chinese New Year Festival at Chinatown in Los Angeles! I didn't draw anything unfortunately. But considering our time spent there, we wouldn't have had any opportunity for it. (couldn't see much either)

Picture of myself before leaving. It was made for a picture story my friend was making! And so are the next two pics.

(makes me wanna buy cultural masks now)

Wot!?

2008-02-05T20:42:00.001-08:00

Craziest shit ever! Class at ELAC started already! And I'm still in Winter Session at Pasadena! WTF. lol. I didn't know it started that early! Cuz Glendale and Pasadena starts 2 weeks from now! lawlz. I missed one class already. Sooooooo, i'm going to one class tomorrow. And then maybe skip my pasadena class for the animal drawing class. yarrr...what a mess. lol

Art Update!

2008-02-04T16:15:00.000-08:00

My Pickle Color test!
Testing before starting on Final Project.

Life Drawings from Calarts Workshop.

And a fun drawing made while watching the cloudy skies.

---On the serious, more boring side, we found out that theres some strange bizness with my financial thing. Now I have to fill out this Petition for Withdrawal from a school I didn't attend. Rawr.

---On the more amusing side, my dad came in just now and handed me a Ringling Box. First thing I thought was, "Oh wow! They must've rejected my application that fast!" I was seriously looking for the, "Im sorry, try again next year." sticker. lol! It was just the catalogue. Oh well~

Old animations

2008-02-02T21:59:00.000-08:00

Drip Animation
Name Animation

Animations made during my Computer Assisted Painting class (more like a illustrator class).

Nothing compared to this ofcourse (lol):

Zoo Trip!

2008-02-01T18:35:00.000-08:00

A full balanced diet of a Crimmy consists of: Nachos, pencils, sketchbooks, and fingers.

Updated Sketchbook @ Conceptart.com!
link
link

(fav. drawing from the zoo trip!)

Yarrr~ The zoo was fun!

And i'm happy for various reasons! I sent my portfolio to RCAD (undeclared, so-so), and I'll soon be sending my portfolio to LCAD & filling out the FAFSA.

Im just a happy pooter.

2008-01-31T18:16:00.000-08:00

"...if you do anime and plan to put it in your portfolio, just don't. You won't be accepted. As one teacher in the illustration department says..Theres a whole country that can do it better than you, so why should you do it." - Onceuponastar

Har har.

Sketchies

2008-01-26T20:07:00.000-08:00

Some sketch i did in a friend's drawing book.

If my dog was human... in a manga. lol!

Portfolio Day!

2008-01-25T21:57:00.000-08:00

Wow, I had lots of fun! I got many good reviews and comments! :D Fixing up my portfolio was a real life saver. I didn't quite get the review I wanted to hear from Calarts, but the other schools were very pleasant. School of Visual Arts (New York), Laguna School of Art and Design, and most of all, Ringling College of Art and Design!

Calarts said that I wasn't quite up to par to the level of Character Animation - She said I had to draw life drawing like I "breath" - But she seemed to suggest to me to try out for their Experimental Animation, since I had storytelling qualities. But Calart's Experimental Animation kinda turns me off. hehe. Anyhoot, I'll just try to apply for Calarts next year, and in the meantime just focus on RCAD and LCAD.

Portfolio under renovation!

2008-01-18T09:52:00.000-08:00

My room is in such a mess. lol! But it's a creative mess?

Recoloring/Redrawing some of my portfolio peices to bring them up to par more:

Old version

New version

Portfooooolioooooo....

1 month later...

2008-01-16T20:14:00.000-08:00

lol!

Couple of self portrait sketches:

(Hi, I'm Crimmy and I have a crooked smile addiction.)

I still haven't applied to any schools. lawlz. And I've already missed the CalArts and Ringling deadline. My next possible try is the school in Laguna. I can do it!

I'm planning to make my next semester of schooling intense!
Tentative Schedule:
I've been reading, "Illusion of Life", "Animator's Survival Kit", and "Perspective". And I'm currently taking Rendering at PCC. I plan to be ready for the portfolio process!

And I'll also be going to the Portfolio Day in Otis on Sunday. Sooooo, wish me luck! Or rather, wish me some talent!

portfolio possibilities~

2007-11-21T17:17:00.000-08:00

I like her face here. (lol)

Need to fix him up before I feel like he's ready for portfolio.

I need more rendered pictures! :O

Roooobot with sky.

2007-11-06T22:30:00.001-08:00

A fun drawing made for a Conceptart.org's Daily Sketch Challenge:

[[CHROMED, MULTI-ARMED, BE-SWORDED ROBOT FRAMED BY BEAUTIFUL BLUE SKY]]

Hes not very chromed, but he is multi-armed! WITH a dagger. lol. This is prolly my best perspective drawing. hahaha, but i just had to draw something since it was robot related. *joy*

The clouds look kinda...like clouds! sorta.

--OOT: Renji from Bleach is a cute character.

Groundbreakin' post! awe

2007-11-05T22:31:00.001-08:00

Something to get this journal started! A picture I've drawn before going to sleep. Which is a thing I've started for myself. Part of my priority, ya know!

The guy in the drawing kinda represents me from a couple months ago. But I've held off buying toys, since new METALLIC repaints are gonna come out next year.

Sorry for my handwriting-

Sign: LAST ONE! Cuz Target hates restocking.

TF Geek: MUST BUY! or klownbots will eat me.

Scalper guy waiting to kill TF Geek for the toy with a ball & spike flail. XD

Goodmorning Sunshine!

Good of the Old

SSSisms - Previous Comm Design Assn.

So far..

Humm.

today

Drawings

Hilarity

just curious

Almost Spring Break!

oy!

A post with less depression

Progress

Sketchies

The comic I colored debuted!

Sketch Poot

Woodruff and stuff

Beautiful rainy day!

old work dump

So fugging tired!!!

More Costume Pics

3D Design project

Got my classes!! Woot!

Preparation for Ringling!

Im going to Ringling afterall!!!

Revision

yarrr

Senior Citizen Indiana

California weather

Comic Book Cover assn.

Halloween makeup design ideas

Guy from comic

zahhhh

Oh, what the future holds for me?

Cover Page sketches

Appropriation Assn.

Theres a first for everything...

BTW

Sigh

World of Warcraft XI? lol

Finished Psychological SP

:D

Art Drop!

Rabanaffren #2!

wahhhh, work!

Sin City!

Couple sketches..

Starship Troopers

Rabanaffren!

Nom nom

Trying it out!

Great News!

Ok, so now a 180º turn...or a 360º

Good News!

Chinese New Year!

Wot!?

Art Update!

Old animations

Zoo Trip!

Sketchies

Portfolio Day!

Portfolio under renovation!

1 month later...

portfolio possibilities~

Roooobot with sky.

Groundbreakin' post! *awe*

Groundbreakin' post! awe